life style

Crimes and murders in Sabah

2008-09-05T00:50:00.000-07:00

This message was forwarded to me by a friend of mine.. after reading someone blog yesterday about one ums student was raped and murdered found somewhere in jln Tuaran, i decided to post this email in my blog.

Sabahan,
Please forward this safety message to your beloved family and friends especially women.
After the kidnap and rape case of a UMS student that shocked the entire Sabah , we need to stay alarm on recent cases which didn't appear on newspaper.

a) A UMS student (girl) was found murdered recently. She has been missing since last month and the search was over when the body was finally discovered.
b) Now, another UMS student is still missing and her family is still searching for clues. She was on her way returing to hostel after spending Convocation holiday at home.
c) Another case of a girl student of Maktab Perguruan Kent . An attempt of kidnapping her (as previous case of UMS student) by pulling her into the car as she was walking failed. But the girl is in trauma now. So, please ask your beloved one to be careful:
1) Never walk alone now on the isolated road / place.
2) Be alert and do not talk on phone while walking as it distracts one's attention on her surrounding.
3) Always walk in group and stay close together.
4) Don't go out late at night.
5) Always tell your family or friend when you plan to go out and inform on the locations.

Let us continue to be a caring community as ignorance can cause more crimes and murders in Sabah .

Dating Advice: Spot and Stop Friends Who Botch Your Love Life

2008-07-20T22:20:00.000-07:00

Four steps to uncover and defend against a 'frenemy' (an enemy disguised as a friend)By Diana Kirschner, Ph.D. Special to Yahoo! Personals Updated: Jul 16, 2008

In the "Sex and the City" movie, Miranda functions as a friend-turned-frenemy and helps derail her friend's dream wedding. At a strategic point in the upcoming nuptials, she verbally puts down the idea of marriage to the commitment-phobic groom! In this one act, Miranda puts a nail in the coffin of her best friend's dream. In case you haven't seen the movie, I won't reveal how things do turn out, but there are lessons learned from this scene.
First of all, finding love is a challenge; and unfortunately, friends and family members can sometimes make it even tougher. When people in your inner circle become negative, pessimistic, competitive, jealous, or don't show you appreciation and/or encouragement, it inflames your own doubts and fears. If you're in a new romantic relationship, these reactions can come on suddenly; they may be familiar and ingrained parts of lifetime relationships that are so subtle, you may not even be fully aware of them. In either case, unsupportive reactions toward your date and you can pull you both back into being hopeless about love. In extreme cases, they can sabotage a growing relationship, as Miranda did in the "Sex and the City" movie! And if you're not dating someone currently,
negative feedback from people close to you can even stop you from getting back in the dating scene or dating altogether.
negative feedback from people close to you can even stop you from getting back in the dating scene or dating altogether.
A friend who feeds you negativity isn't a friend, but a frenemy. A frenemy may be chipping away your dating potential without you even being aware of it. Ask yourself, do any of these incidents sound familiar?
A "best friend" takes an instant dislike to a date you really like
A friend insists that all the "good ones" are taken
A sister/brother reminds you of your past failures or the duds you've fallen for
Dad criticizes any date you bring around
Mom clucks about how men/women would find you more attractive if you only lost those 10 pounds
Your two closest friends flake on the first dinner party you're hosting with your date
These are typical behaviors of friends-turned-frenemies. Here are four steps to use to handle frenemies and protect your love life:

Step 1: Uncover frenemies
Who do you spend the most time with socially? Regarding the people close to you, answer the following questions:
Are they single? Are they in a relationship? If so, do they generally describe it as loving or not?
Do you feel good hanging around them? How do you feel right after being with them?
Are they supportive of your self-esteem and attractiveness?
What are their attitudes towards love or relationships in general?
How do they react when you're in a relationship?

Step 2: Stop your whining
Often you are unconsciously encouraging your frenemies to be negative by complaining to them about what is wrong with your love life. For three days, take a notebook and make a note of every time you complain to anyone. For the next three days complain to no one. Write about how this feels.

Step 3: Make a list of what you need from frenemies
For example, you may need your best friend to stop complaining about how awful men/women are. You may need your dad/mom to tell you what he/she really likes about your new date.

Step 4: Ask your frenemies to give you the support you need
Be straight and honest.
Tell them you want to have a positive outlook about love and you need them to be positive too. Most will respond.
Tell them you want to have a positive outlook about love and you need them to be positive too. Most will respond. With the few frenemies who resist and continue being negative, move to a more distant, yet polite, relationship with them. You have to protect yourself and your own hopeful outlook on love.

Anyone can make a mistake and can turn frenemy on you. But if this does happen, follow these steps, and you will find that you can turn things back around so that you have a truly supportive posse. And by the way, if you and your wonderful posse would like to see if your dating patterns are more like Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, or Miranda, take my free quiz at www.mydatingpatterns.com.

Should you blog for business?

2008-07-18T00:07:00.000-07:00

It seems like everybody wants a blog these days, but is a blog really necessary for a company? Here are some things to ask yourself before blogging for your business.

1. Do you have time to blog? Blogging is a time-consuming process because people who read blogs expect a certain amount of fresh content on a regular basis -- at a minimum, weekly -- preferably several times a week.

2. Do you have anything interesting to say? Blogs about your company and your products may sound interesting to you, but people rarely tune into a "commercial" blog unless there is additional information of real value.

3. Do you have strong opinions? The most successful blogs are the ones with strong voices, personalities and opinions. If you want to be non-controversial at all times, maybe a blog isn't your optimal marketing tool.

4. Are you good at getting a conversation going and engaging an audience? Blogging isn't just publishing posts. A blog becomes a defacto online community and needs the same kind of attention that a message board or forum needs to keep it vibrant and on track. Yes, you can shut off the comments feature on your blog, however, you lose out on a potentially valuable aspect of blogging for business in the first place -- an engaged audience of customers and potential customers.

5. Do you have a company policy on blogging? If you are a company of one, you still need some guidelines that you will follow as you blog for your business. What will you do if someone posts a nasty comment about you or your company, for example? Knowing in advance how you will handle situations that might come up saves you a lot of confusion later.

6. Do you have a thick skin? Once you open up the conversation in a blog and allow others to comment, you may hear things you don't like from unhappy customers or people who disagree with your point of view. Can you take it without taking it personally?

7. Can you afford to pay someone to blog for you? Some people do hire professional bloggers or pro-bloggers to craft blog posts and keep the ideas and conversations flowing. Pro-bloggers are usually paid anywhere from $10 to $50 per post depending on their reputation, the frequency of posting, the amount of research required and the complexity of the topic.There are many ways to develop compelling, valuable, conversation-starting blog posts, and I'll talk about those in the near future. Right now, review your answers to the questions above and unless you answered "Yes" to most or all of them, a blog just might not be for you.

Aliza Sherman is The Entrepreneur Mom on WorkItMom.com as well as an avid blogger and writer in many other places. Her work can be found at www.mediaegg.com.